Friday, March 6, 2009

Help at Last!

I heard another man being dragged up the scaffolding to meet his death today. It’d become so commonplace that I learned to just cover my ears to block out the curses of the doomed men whenever it happened. Even with my ears covered, I could still feel the thud as the ax robs one more individual of life. And the cheers of the crowds continued to fill me with fear and dread. I might have said a prayer in my heart for this poor man (at least I thought I did), but I didn’t give him anymore thought. I couldn’t believe how numb I’d become to it now. Another day, another execution. Or so I thought.

This time didn’t end with the cheers of the mob. Instead I heard gunshots. Confused by this, I carefully drew back one of the curtains to see what was happening outside. (I did this at a great risk to my own life, mind you.) I saw a man and a woman inside an adjacent building surrounded by that mob. I thought they were goners for sure, but then I noticed that they were the ones holding guns. It must have been them that fired those shots! The two of them worked as a team as they ran into the square and took out as many of those crazies as they could. I should have been shocked to see more death, but I think I was more shocked just by the presence of those two.

While I was watching them, I heard a helicopter come out of nowhere and fire a missile at a huge steel gate. The shockwaves rocked my house like an earthquake. I don’t think anyone near the blast could have survived. When I looked out of my window again, I saw that everyone except that man and woman had disappeared. I guess they’re afraid of missiles.

It looked as if things had calmed down, so I grabbed my binoculars to get a better look at these two crazy people. I mean you have to be crazy to think you can take on thousands of people acting like rabid dogs! The woman looked like she was from around here. She was wearing sporty clothes, and she had a gun belt and a large knife. It looked like she knew how to use them. The man was wearing similar clothes, but underneath his gun belt he wore a shirt that looked like some kind of uniform. He looked pretty beefy, like an 80s action movie star. I saw he had a badge on his sleeve that said BSAA. When I saw that badge, so many things just fell into place for me. To the best of my knowledge BSAA only gets involved in situations dealing with bioterrorism. I bet you somebody unleashed a virus or something to make everyone start acting so out of control. It could be like a super version of mad cow disease.

Whatever it really is, I’m sure the BSAA brought some vaccines to help everyone. Thank God for that. I also hope they brought some whiskey with them, because I haven’t had a drink in forever. Wouldn’t mind sharing a drink or two with that cute female BSAA agent either. I’m sure she knows a few good moves.

At any rate, I’m going to be OK! Thanks to everyone out there who got the word out. Now I can go back to writing about the important things – booze and babes!

35 comments:

  1. Yaaay yous will be saved ^.^

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  2. back to the important things, whats your favorite brand of beer?

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  3. I'm glad things are turning a tittle bit more bright for you...

    I wish someone could rescue me as well...

    .

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  4. That's wonderful news, Adam! I'm glad you managed to survive this ordeal.

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  5. ugh japan is playing right now, and i have to wait another week!

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  6. Adam! In case you meet them, their names are Chris Redfield and Sheva Alomar. The man that was executed as Reynard Fisher. Poor fellow. Chris and Sheva are on a mission to catch a weapons dealer named Ricardo Irving, and the virus released is called Uroboros. Infects ya full of worms. Anyways, meet up with them as soon as you can - it's dangerous, and they have guns. Oh, the helicopter was piloted by a BSAA pilot named Kirk Mathison. But he died. Poor Kirk.

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  7. Listen Adam, You had better run out to them and get help instead of staying in your little hut, and hurry because we already know, that if you do not hurry, your love, Allyson, will become one of the whacked people

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  8. Adam....did Mr. $miley help you, or DID-HE-HELP-YOU!?

    Now get your ass back home champ. Drinks are on me. And thanks to this chopper pilot I met back in 2004 I know a great bar....

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  9. yay! Adam!!! im soo happy to hear you are going to live! you were waaay to cool of a blogger to die! look forward to seeing you on Friday, March, 13!!! WOOT WOOT!

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  10. I was kinda hoping that you would get beheaded by that ax guy... Oh well... I guess I'm gonna go help Uncle Al with his experiments alone :(

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  11. I dunno Mr. $, you just can't beat a beer and burger at Emmy's back in Raccoon. :(

    So Adam! There's a great place around here in Maryland, called the Green Turtle. They make a killer jagerbomb.

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  12. YES YOUR SAFE! THANK GOD! If YOU DIED WHAT WOULD SPEND MY FRIDAY NIGHT READING?

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  13. We're all happy for your safety Adam, but you should still watch your back intil your outta there...

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  14. I think, I may have seen you blond girlfriend, but she didn't look too good.

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  16. Oh my god, Chris and Sheva, and BSAA?! They're finally here! You better go out there right now and get their attention. Tell them your situation and have them bring in the chopper and have BSAA pick you up (oh, and your GF too).

    What are you waiting for? GO!

    GET IN DA CHOPPA!

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  17. Oh no! Adam please update so we know you're alive! It's Friday and you haven't updated yet. Please please let us know you're alive. Allyson is already doomed to her horrible fate, that poor girl. She asked for it when she left you.

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  19. I'm pretty sure I just blew off Allyson's head.

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  20. Adam, te apoyamos desde España amigo :)

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  21. Hey Adam, are you okay?! You haven't updated in a while, please post more!!! Just so we know you're okay. Please! :(

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  22. I bet adam became a big ball of tentacles... Ah... Uroboros... TOTAL GLOBAL SATURATION FTW!

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  23. No, ADAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM...! D':
    Dammit man, live...!

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  24. last post july its now october!

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  25. It's been about a couple years since the post. Tell me you got out of Kijuju, and tell me you didn't run into any Majini.

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  26. Oh, and uh...I MAY have killed Allyson...hope you weren't too attached to her. Still, the ivory relief that she held fetched a nice price on the market.

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  27. I think Adam is death people... almost 3 years without updates here =/

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